Its less than 2 weeks before we are suppose to leave on a well organised well communicated trip together with MassBuild. (Builders Warehouse, Builders Trade Depot and Builders Express) Everything well organised except us.
I find it challenging to keep my thoughts in a place where I know that only good lies before me and life loves me. It is and always will be all good. For months we have worked hard on sending documents, sharing a beautiful dream constructing a well planned communication and production dream. Only for me to arrive at this point where I am at a loss of words. This was most certainly only a lesson and not meant to be. I now need to let go of the past set myself free and give myself the opportunity in the present moment to love freely again. Although it felt like a blow in the heart I can move on. There is most certainly a blessed reason for my Higher purpose.
Sitting in a project meeting where only I can answer for the lack of forward momentum on Ripples side, I suddenly feel an overwhelming feeling of I CAN. Committing to the dates we all committed to and committing to all the schools and all the work that needs to be done. I feel safe with a warm feeling touching my heart. I have support, I can do this. I can honour commitments I made together with a group.
As I leave the meeting I feel tears well up in my eyes and my chest tighten. Why did this happen like this? Knowing that all I need to know will come to me at the right moment, I climb on the bike and decide to not think of the what ifs......I takes me a good while to just let go of everyone I could think of I can blame for this situation. I stopped here there almost every 15minutes on my way to my family just outside Rustenburg.
My thoughts and feelings are on a very thin line either dark and hopeless or inspired and safe. Again I feel a warm sense of certainty, it will always all be good.
